


I Let Them Use Me Because I'm Scared

by Shhua



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst-ish?, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-09
Updated: 2018-01-09
Packaged: 2019-03-02 17:09:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13322703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shhua/pseuds/Shhua
Summary: ❛I let them use me, because it makes me feel worth something. They leave and I realize I'm not worth anything to them or to myself.❜(in other words, Joshua's 'friends' ditch him, and Vernon visits him in attempt to try to cheer him up.)





	I Let Them Use Me Because I'm Scared

This was rare for Jisoo but, he was absolutely livid. It wasn't like this was anything new, but the brunette's  _so-called friends_ had ditched him  _once again_. This wasn't much of a surprise, as it happened so often, but it still hurt that they chose to completely neglect Jisoo, without even giving him a heads up beforehand. Jisoo's friends had always used, fucked up something for/or with him, or completely ditched him. Which was what Jisoo  _most_  hated. It had always been hard to make friends with people for Jisoo, he was naturally socially awkward, and he hated it. It was almost like God wanted him to live his life miserably.

Jisoo was so in his thoughts and self-pity that he didn't even realize the violent bangs on his apartment door, and had finally only snapped out of his trance when his younger friend,  _Hansol_  had tapped him.  **"I came here to hang out with you, the least you could do is open your own god damn door"** Hansol started off, pushing the older one slightly. Jisoo didn't know why the younger had come, and he  _definitely_  didn't invite him, but as of right now he couldn't be bothered to care. Hansol noticed the sad expression on Jisoo's face and had made a slight comment on it,  **"you seem down, did someone stand you up or some shit-** _ **oh**_ **.."**

 _Bingo_.

➳

 ** _"You could literally cry out a whole river, holy shit"_** Although Hansol wasn't one for emotional support, he had a good shoulder for Jisoo to cry on,  _literally_.  **"** **Are you done yet?** **No offense shua, but You're making me look** _ **super** _**_gay_ ****right now"** Jisoo moved away from Hansol slightly, grabbing one of the tissues from the tissue box Hansol had got him.  **"Right, I know what'll make you feel better..."**  Hansol moved away from the living room, and into the kitchen fetching a container, then handing it to Joshua.

 ** _"What is it?"_**  He asked, confused at why Hansol had just given him a random container.  _ **"Open it..?"**_

 **"I'm not sure if I even trust you enough to open it."** Jisoo crossed his arms in disbelief, it definitely wasn't anything good, nothing good ever came from the younger one. **"** **Jesus fucking Christ,** **I didn't infect it or anything just-"**

 **"Oh"** To Jisoo's surprise, for once his friend hadn't given him anything infected, and it happened to be one of his favorite foods for coping. Chicken. **"** **See?** **I can be nice sometimes.."** Hansol looked down slightly, due to the small awkward moment. **"yeah,** **yeah** **,** **whatever you say, give me and my chicken a second"**

➳

 **"Wipe your hands on me, and I'll end your life, hyung."** Jisoo had finished his chicken long ago, but he was way too lazy to walk into the kitchen for a napkin, so instead, why not use his friend's shirt?  **"Oh yeah?"**

 **"** **You** **\- you bitch."** Hansol grabbed one of the pillows off the couch, throwing it at Jisoo in return for him wiping chicken grease on his shirt.  **"If you don't mind me asking, shua-"**  Hansol started off, turning serious once again,  **"why do you still stay friends with them if you know they constantly** _ **take you for granted**_ **?"** Jisoo thought for a moment, he didn't have an answer for what was asked, at least not a good one. In Jisoo's mind, staying with his so-called friends was better than not having friends at all, and going through all the conflict just to break away from them would be tiring.

Jisoo thought for a second about his response, before letting out a sigh.  **"I let them use me because it makes me feel worth something. It makes me feel needed for once, I'm scared of being alone, Hansol. they ditched me now, and I realize I'm not worth anything. not to them, and I'm definitely not worth anything to myself."**  Jisoo finishes off his spitball of words, letting out all the stress he didn't even know he held in for so long. Hansol looks shocked, he didn't exactly expect a real response, but he was somewhat glad he got one.  **"I'm okay now, you can go,"** Jisoo says quietly, he was somewhat regretting what he said now, fearing that Hansol was judging him. 

 _ **"Not yet.."**_ Hansol can't help but feel sad for the dude, he didn't wanna leave him alone to pity himself any more than already had. **"You, Hong Jisoo are not alone, at least not anymore. I will sit here all day if I have to — you can not, what so ever.. pity yourself, or hang around with those cunts any longer."** silence. ** _"Is that an order?"_** Hansol was stiff for a second, but then nodded confidently, 

 **"Fine"**  Joshua moved slightly, resting his head back down on Hansol's shoulder.  **"I'll follow your orders, as long as you** _ **promise**_ **to not leave me...** _ **And maybe get me more chicken."**_  Hansol rolled his eyes as His friend's add-on, but agreed none the less.  **"I promise,** **okay** **?"**  For the first time today, Jisoo had genuinely smiled, and it was only because of Hansol.  **"Also you're making me look gay** _ **again** _**but,** **I _guess_ ****I'll allow it for a** ** _little_ ****longer."**

**"Wow, Choi Hansol is accepting my affection for once? Am I turning you soft-"**

**"You wish, Jisoo."**  Hansol couldn't resist and started carding his hands through Jisoo's hair a little bit, it was soft. Not long after, the elder had drifted off into a deep sleep on Hansol's shoulder, still smiling.

➳

**"You totally enjoyed me on your shoulder."**

_**"Not true, you're full of shit"** _

**"I felt your hands in my hair"**

**_"I was curious, it's really soft by the way-Fine, it was..alright."_ **

➳

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first ever one-shot on here, so I hope it's not too shitty.


End file.
